NorteñoBlog

Since NorteñoBlog last checked Billboard‘s Latin charts, the magazine has decided to give us all a gift: the website is now posting 20 more spots on its Regional Mexican airplay chart. There you will find such curiosities as:

— Marco Antonio Solis crooning about a lying mujer while swathed in a toga of strings and synths (#29);

— a previous Pick to Click from Fuerza de Tijuana, about a former honcho in the Medellín Cartel (#31);

— more chipper puro sax bands than you can shake a slimy mouthpiece at (#23, #30, and #32) — all of them ruled by the saxophone colossus at #18, La Maquinaria Norteña;

— and even more clones of Ariel Camacho. Am I alone in thinking The Clones of Ariel Camacho would make a great Univision variety show? TWENTY SUPER SERIOUS YOUNG REQUINTO PLAYERS SING OF DEATH AND LOST LOVE, Omar Burgos furiously triple-tongues his tuba whenever someone gets voted off, and everyone forgets the names of their second guitarists. Could work. In any case, Nano Machado, Los de la Noria, Los Plebes, and Ulices Chaidez are all representing Sierreño music in the bottom 20, and Chaidez has two additional songs in the overall Hot Latin top 50. This fountain of youth isn’t drying up any time soon.

Also brightening up the bottom 20 is another dude who fooled around with Sierreño earlier in 2016: Adriel Favela, whose “Tomen Nota,” a duet with Los Del Arroyo, was a credible candidate for Wristwatch Porn Video of the Year. Now he’s back with a big banda-fied glob of living-the-high-life bullshit called “Mis Gustos, Mis Placeres,” a duet with fellow Gerencia 360 pretty boy Jonatan Sanchez, about all their likes and dislikes. You might have guessed that Favela likes drinking with pretty mujeres, but did you also know that he enjoys packing a pistol? Or that he dislikes treacherous people who give him problems? That they, in fact, are the reason he’s packing? Don’t be those people! With Sanchez you’re on a little bit safer ground, unless you’re a rooster — because if you’re a rooster, Sanchez likes watching you fight other roosters. True to form, the video boasts split-screen closeups of expensive watches and some cockfighting footage. NorteñoBlog cannot in good conscience endorse this song. However, since NorteñoBlog’s own dislikes include good consciences, Pick to Click:

Maybe you dislike banda. Or songs about cockfighting. In that case, Billboard‘s sudden expansion of its charts gives us a good excuse to post two Picks to Click. The second is at #16 airplay and #40 on the big chart: Omar Ruiz teams up with Gerardo Ortiz to sing “Ando Bien,” probably the best song on Ruiz’s disappointing album Asi es la Vida (Badsin). (Singing flat isn’t necessarily a deal-breaker… unless, like Ruiz, you also insist on singing romantic ballads.) Ruiz had a surprise hit earlier this year with “El Americano,” a duet with the aforementioned Fuerza de Tijuana about a different honcho in the aforementioned Medellín Cartel, which may have inspired “El Mexico Americano,” the not-yet-mentioned El Komander song at #39 this week. (Citation needed.) Like Adriel Favela’s single, “Ando Bien” is about living the high life, but it’s humbler and therefore not as much bullshit. Ruiz and Ortiz throw a party with unas damas; they drink Buchanan’s, smoke pot, listen to corridos, and refrain from threatening haters with guns. Trombone and accordion trade off lead instrument duties, and the band achieves a lovely midtempo lope that’ll make you nod your head and possibly topple over.

These are the top 50 Hot Latin Songs and top 20 Regional Mexican Songs, courtesy Billboard, as published December 24.

1. “Chantaje” – Shakira ft. Maluma
2. “Shaky Shaky” – Daddy Yankee
3. “Safari” – J Balvin ft. Pharrell Williams, BIA & Sky
4. “Hasta El Amanecer” – Nicky Jam (48 weeks!)
5. “La Bicicleta” – Carlos Vives & Shakira
6. “Chillax” – Farruko ft. Ky-Mani Marley
7. “Otra Vez” – Zion & Lennox ft. J Balvin
8. “Tengo Que Colgar” – Banda MS (#1 RegMex)
9. “Duele El Corazón” – Enrique Iglesias ft. Wisin
10. “Vente Pa’ Ca” – Ricky Martin ft. Maluma

11. “Vacaciones” – Wisin
12. “Dile Que Tu Me Quieres” – Ozuna
13. “Sin Contrato” – Maluma ft. Fifth Harmony
14. “Nunca Me Olvides” – Yandel
15. “Afuera Esta Lloviendo” (#3 RegMex) – Julión Álvarez y su Norteño Banda
16. “Regresa Hermosa” – Gerardo Ortiz (#2 RegMex)
17. “Te Quiero Pa’ Mi” – Don Omar & Zion & Lennox
18. “Cuatro Babys” – Maluma ft. Bryant Myers x Noriel x Juhn
19. “Amor del Bueno” – Calibre 50 (#10 RegMex)
20. “Reggaeton Lento (Bailemos)” – CNCO

21. “Si No Te Quiere” – Ozuna ft. Arcangel & Farruko
22. “Bailar” – Deorro ft. Elvis Crespo
23. “Fuego” – Juanes
24. “Quien Te Entiende” – Crecer German (#12 RegMex)
25. “Yo Sí Te Amé” – Arrolladora (#4 RegMex)
26. “Tú No Vive Así” – Mambo Kingz & DJ Luian presenta Arcangel x Bad Bunny
27. “En La Intimidad” – Ozuna
28. “Porque Me Enamoré” – Ulices Chaidez y Sus Plebes
29. “Traicionera” – Sebastián Yatra
30. “Culpable Tu” – Alta Consigna (#33 RegMex)

31. “A Ver a Que Horas” – Banda Carnaval (#5 RegMex)
32. “En Estos Dias” – Regulo Caro (#15 RegMex)
33. “Olvidame y Pega la Vuelta” – Jennifer Lopez & Marc Anthony
34. “Cómo Te Llamas” – La Trakalosa de Monterrey (#6 RegMex)
35. “Siempre Te Voy a Querer” – Calibre 50
36. “Me Está Tirando el Rollo” – Banda Los Recoditos (#7 RegMex)
37. “Adios Amor” – Christian Nodal
38. “Me Estorbas” – Pesado (#9 RegMex)
39. “El México Americano” – El Komander (#8 RegMex)
40. “Ando Bien” – Omar Ruiz ft. Gerardo Ortiz (#16 RegMex)

41. “Pa’ Que Me Invitan” – Jencarlos ft. Charly Black
42. “Te Regalo” – Ulices Chaidez y Sus Plebes
43. “La Mala y La Buena” – Alex Sensation + Gente de Zona
44. “De Pies a Cabeza” – Maná & Nicky Jam
45. “Acércate” – De La Ghetto
46. “Que Gano Olvidandote” – Reik
47. “A Poco” – Raúl Casillas (#11 RegMex)
48. “Take It Off” – Lil Jon ft. Yandel & Becky G
49. “Me Llamas” – Piso 21 ft. Maluma
50. “Si Ella Quisiera” – Justin Quiles

¡Adios!
“Amorcito Enfermito” – Hector Acosta “El Torito”
“Tú y Yo” – Tommy Torres ft. Daddy Yankee
“Como Sanar” – Frank Reyes
“Quisiera” – CNCO
“Deja Que Te Bese” – Alejandro Sanz ft. Marc Anthony
“Sola” – Becky G
“Bobo” – J Balvin
“La Carretera” – Prince Royce
“Ya Me Enteré” – Reik

—————–

12. “Yo Si Me Enamoré” – La Séptima Banda
13. “Te Dirán” – La Adictiva Banda (#5 RegMex)
14. “Por Enamorarme” – Ariel Camacho y Los Plebes del Rancho
17. “No Lo Hice Bien” – Los Plebes Del Rancho de Ariel Camacho
18. “Como Si Fuera Real” – La Maquinaria Norteña
19. “El Cuento Perfecto” – Banda Los Sebastianes
20. “Un Hombre Con Suerte” – Duelo

21. “Ya Me Vi” – El Dasa
22. “El Hombre del Equipo” – Grupo Maximo Grado
23. “Hoy Me Toca Perder” – La Energia Norteña
24. “Pa Que No Me Anden Contando” – Voz de Mando
25. “Mis Gustos, Mis Placeres” – Adriel Favela ft. Jonatan Sanchez
26. “Volé, Soñé y La Ame” – Norteño 4.5
27. “El Paciente” – Alfredo Olivas
28. “Por Eso Volvi” – Nano Machado y Los Keridos
29. “Eran Mentiras” – Marco Antonio Solis
30. “Me Gusta” – Revancha Norteña

31. “El Popeye” – Fuerza de Tijuana
32. “Amigos Para Que” – La Reunion Norteña
34. “Transparente” – Jonatan Sanchez
35. “Que Caro Estoy Pagando” – Los Plebes del Rancho de Ariel Camacho
36. “Tendrás Que Renunciar a Mi” – Los de la Noria
37. “Mi Venganza” – Los Tucanes de Tijuana
38. “Cóctel de Olvido” – Leandro Ríos
39. “Andamos en el Ruedo” – Ulices Chaidez y Sus Plebes
40. “DEL Negociante” – Los Plebes del Rancho de Ariel Camacho

¡Adios!
“Renunciacion” – Los Huracanes Del Norte
“No Me Vas a Convencer” – Conjunto Primavera ft. Antonio Meléndez
“Cómo Olvidarte” – El Bebeto
“Cicatriiices” – Regulo Caro
“Fuiste Mia” – Gerardo Ortiz
“Todo Es Diferente” – La Maquinaria Norteña
“Me Está Gustando” – Banda Los Recoditos
“Como No Queriendo” – Fidel Rueda
“¿Desde Cuándo No Me Quieres?” – Banda Carnaval
“No Es Normal” – Cheyo Carrillo
“Me Vas a Extrañar” – Banda MS