bien servida

Welcome to the Mexican charts, where change, as my cosmetic podiatrist likes to say, is afoot. Although it’s been several weeks since NorteñoBlog tuned in to the Mexican radio, the rate of turnover feels much quicker there than in El Norte. For example, check out the norteño and banda songs that have been hanging around the charts the longest:

U.S. Hot Latin:
#19 – “Ya Te Perdí La Fe” by Arrolladora, 26 weeks
#4 – “Solo Con Verte” by Banda MS, 25 weeks
#13 – “Broche de Oro” by Trakalosa, 24 weeks
#14 – “Tomen Nota” by Adriel Favela ft. Los Del Arroyo, 20 weeks
#19 – “DEL Negociante” by Los Plebes del Rancho de Ariel Camacho, 20 weeks

Mexican Popular:
#8 – “Tragos de Alcohol” by El Komander, 14 semanas
#13 – “Préstamela a Mí” by Calibre 50, 14 semanas
#17 – “El Borrachito” by Julión Álvarez, 14 semanas
#7 – “Espero Con Ansias” by Remmy Valenzuela, 13 semanas
#12 – “María” by Pepe Aguilar, 11 semanas

I know what you’re thinking: the Mexican list is way better, and not just because you’re sick of all the U.S. songs after five months! You’re right, but that quality judgment is probably just a coincidence. (And one that doesn’t account for NorteñoBlog’s fave wristwatch porn jam “Tomen Nota.”) You might also be thinking these two charts aren’t equivalent, because Hot Latin measures radio plus streams plus downloads, whereas the Mexican Popular chart only measures radio. Verdadero; but if you check out Billboard‘s radio-only Regional Mexican chart, the U.S. songs have charted for roughly the same amount of time, give or take a week, plus you find Adictiva’s certified 37-weeker “Después de Ti, ¿Quién?”, a real tantric filibuster.

At the opposite end of the spectrum are the chart debuts. This week both charts boast three new songs (the U.S. Regional Mexican radio chart boasts zero new songs):

U.S. Hot Latin:
#32 – “Me Va a Pesar” by Arrolladora
#39 – “Bien Servida” by Los Gfez ft. Diego Herrera
#49 – “Juro Quererte” by Hijos de Barrón

Mexican Popular:
#10 – “Ataúd” by Los Tigres
#18 – “Botellitas” by Beto Zapata
#20 – “Picky” by Joey Montana

Three debuts is not unusual for the Mexican radio chart, but the U.S. Hot Latin chart never sees three regional Mexican debuts in a week. This week is the exception that proves the rule!

Of all these new tunes, “Picky” is the outlier, a year-old two-chord cartoon reggaeton number that replaces Maluma’s “El Perdedor” as the token tropical song on Mexico’s norteño chart. To be fair, Joey Montana uses his two chords much better than U2 did in that stupid song with all the “-ation” rhymes at the end.

“Botellitas” is a charming cumbia cover of Cornelio Reyna’s mariachi movie tune, as sung and played by Pesado‘s frontman Beto Zapata. It replaces La Original‘s “Amor de los Pobres” as Mexican radio’s token classic remake.

Los Tigres’ “Ataúd” replaces LOS! BuiTRES!‘s “Me Dio Gusto Conocerte” as the token boring ballad by a group who should really know better.

On the U.S. charts, Arrolladora’s new song is arrollaDULLa, amirite?, and has therefore scored 1.7 million YouTube hits in less than a week.

Last time out we discussed both the cannibalistic kissers in Los Hijos and the opportunistic Diego Herrera. Despite the timeliness of Los Hijos’ lovelorn guitars in our post-Ariel Camacho world, I hereby bestow Pick to Click status upon Herrera’s “Bien Servida.” This duet with Los Gfez features accordion dueling with tuba, contending with a full brass section, straining against a climbing keening melody, all in the service of some possibly imaginary fornication. And cannibalistic kissing. Please tell me eating people’s lips isn’t a thing now.

These are the Top 20 “Popular” songs in Mexico, as measured by monitorLATINO. Don’t confuse “Popular” with the “General” list, which contains many of the same songs but also “Stressed Out,” “Cake By the Ocean,” “No,” and “Con Tus Besos,” an ode to sunshine springtime love by a man named PeeWee who, if his video can be believed, is a big fan of Skype sex. Hey, as long as he’s not eating anyone’s lips, it’s cool.

1. “Te Dirán” – La Adictiva
2. “Me Vas a Extrañar” – Banda MS
3. “Inevitable” – Banda El Recodo
4. “Me Esta Gustando” – Banda Los Recoditos
5. “Todo o Nada” – Alfredo Olivas
6. “Millones de Besos” – Gerardo Ortiz
7. “Espero Con Ansias” – Remmy Valenzuela
8. “Tragos de Alcohol” – Alfredo Ríos El Komander
9. “No Es Culpa Tuya” – Chuy Lizarraga
10. “Ataúd” – Los Tigres del Norte

11. “El Shot” – Banda Tierra Sagrada
12. “María” – Pepe Aguilar
13. “Préstamela a Mí” – Calibre 50
14. “Se Me Olvido Quererte” – Banda Los Sebastianes
15. “Necesito” – Hermanos Vega Jr.
16. “Me Complementas” – Arrolladora
17. “El Borrachito” – Julión Álvarez y Su Norteño Banda
18. “Botellitas” – Beto Zapata
19. “Hablemos” – Ariel Camacho
20. “Picky” – Joey Montana

“Amor de los Pobres” – La Original Banda El Limón
“El Perdedor” – Maluma
“Supiste Hacerme Mal” – Edwin Luna y La Trakalosa de Monterrey
“Me Dio Gusto Conocerte” – Los Buitres de Culiacán Sinaloa
“Tu Ausencia” – Intocable
“A Veces” – Espinoza Paz
“Que No Te Sorprenda” – Claudio Alcaraz
“Solo Con Verte” – Banda MS